Ego Talking

Dear You,

I wanted to start out by telling you that I love you..
And this is a guide too..
Understanding my ego..
It's fragile..
It dicates how I handle you..
I speaks for me.. It clouds my judgement..
And this is not an atonement..
I think this is for your on discernment..
This is me.. Trying to own it..
My ego.. Will remain consist..
It makes me texting OK. instead of expressing my disinterest..
My ego.. Never listens..
It makes me double down instead of apologizing for my intentions..
And when I've calm down and it's time to revisit..
Everything feels different..
You're open to hear me but your heart never listens..
Our egos clash..
And you emotionally crash..
When I'm seating in the vehicle next to you..
But you can't see me telling you to slow down.. Putting on your seatbelt first becasue when you look around..
You don't see the stop signs..
You're convinced in your mind..
That my ego is the reason we're here..
Not realizing your ego shows up through fear..
But your ego.. Doesn't allow every situation to be different..
You're cautious with every message.. And in an instance..
You shut down.. To leave me with my feelings..
No type of place for safe healing..
I wish that we had a safe space..
I wish that you could see peace when you see my face..
But your ego.. Sees me as a threat..
So you have to protect..
You..
So you do what you do..
While.. I'm left with my ego and sadness..
I think your ego.. Can't manage..
Being vulnerable..
Being reliable..
Staying consistent..
Seeing the potential.. Thinking this will be diffent..
And my ego wants to show you that I'm not going anywhere..
I think your ego geninuely doesn't care..
So it makes me jump out the window.. For..
Simple issues..
Even in arguments, know that my ego will pick fights..
Just to say that it was right..
My ego doesn't understand love is about compromise..
In my mind.. I'm the prize..
Even when I look in your eyes..
I see the hurt.. But my ego doesn't recognize..
The pain that I put you through..
Not saying.. I love you..
I see your ego not believing me if I ever uttered it..
You don't see love as a benefit..
Your ego believes that you don't deserve it..
My ego wants to give it to you but your ego wants to make me earn it..
Why can't our egos find some common ground for once..
Because it's up to us..
To make this work.. To make this last..
Your ego is afraid of the past..
And my ego is afriad of the future..
So we can't stay present.. To save us..
And what I crave is us..
So we become each other's triggers.. Sigh..
I hope that one day.. We can come together.. And grow to be better..
And learn how to silence out egos..
Until then.. We will never know..